I just started my new job at Great Basin Scientific. So far I love it. I feel useful and I think I'll be able to do a good job there. I also have my own office for the first time in my career and it has been so nice. I'm getting everything set up and organized to help me focus and work hard when I'm at work. I was talking with the IT guy and getting my e-mail and everything set up early on. While talking with him on the phone he asked, "How do you spell your name?"
Easy question! Z_a_c_k_e_r_y
I waited 5 minutes as requested and then logged in to my new account ...which was assigned the uncomfortable spelling of Z_a_c_h_e_r_y.
I've always liked how my name was spelled simply and phoenetically. I even like the way the letters are shaped. So confident was I in the spelling that I refer to those "fake Zacks" as Zatch because the spelling of Zachary seems ludicrous to me. Where else does char make a "ker" sound? Not "care" like character, but "ker" like, you know, Zackery? (That's right, Carrie, I've moved on from the cha in mechanical ;o) )
I found out in the recent months that apparently some nurse cornered my Dad in the hospital and asked how to spell his new baby boy's name. He gave the spelling and apparently has felt guilt over these years because he didn't know how to spell it then and I've been suffering thorough life with a mediocre name spelling. He asked if it has caused me much trouble. "Sure, but I take pride in it!"
I'm never tempted to buy the "personalized" gimmick gifts anywhere because they all spell Zackery incorrectly! No one ever pronounces my name wrong because it is so obvious how it should be. Oh, and I have e-mail addresses at hotmail, yahoo and gmail with my name spelled corectly, which wouldn't have been possible without a 16243 or something after my name if it was Zachary. It never really bothers me when people spell my name wrong, which happens all the time, but I like pointing it out from time to time. It is also a good reminder to me to pay attention to the details because you can make someone feel good or worthless with a simple thing like knowing their name, or spelling it correctly in an e-mail, or mentioning something they did well.
I, of course, had to call the IT guy back and get him to correct the spelling on my account (which I had to do at Idaho Technology as well, for the record). But I think it bothered me a little bit that this IT guy spelled it wrong. I think it was because his question gave the impression that he was cared, and wanted to spelling my name correctly. Then, in the space of less than 5 minutes he spelled it incorrectly. Maybe it was because I had the false expectation that my name would then be spelled right, or maybe it was because I knew I had to call and correct him, and I wanted to just move forward. Who knows.
I've thought about him spelling my name wrong a couple times since then. I've come to the following conclusions
- That he indeed DOES care about spelling peoples name correctly
- That he is an individual with average to above average intelligence
- That he have average to above average hearing and comprehension skills
- That he is a Native English speaker
- That I am a native English speaker with average to above average communication skills
- That my speech was clear and strait-forward
- That neither of us was under the influence of alcohol or drugs
- That the phone line was clear and static free
Given all of that how could the miscommunication have occurred? I've assigned it to something I'm going to call confident questioning.
I believe Confident questioning occurs all the time in communication and that it is a detriment to communication. I'm defining Confident Questioning as someone asking a question, even though they have a high percentage confidence that they know what the answer will be. Here's an example. If I ask the question "Noah, would you like this ice cream cone?" I'm pretty much just being polite, or maybe even teasing, because I'm 99% sure that you are about 30 seconds away from looking like this...
The IT guy, in my opinion, asked me how to spell my name, but was pretty much already writing it instead of listening to me. It can be very dangerous to ask a question without being prepared to actually listen to the answer. Several years ago I got upset with someone who asked my opinion about something and then got upset because my opinion didn't agree with theirs.
So I'd counsel you to really listen to people. Ask questions, but more importantly, be open to answers. You never know when you'll learn something new, or understand someone a little bit better, or even just make a new guy feel happy that you spelled his awesome name right.
Love,
Daddydoo
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